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While You Were Out by Meg Kissinger

Memoir

While You Were Out

Performed by Author

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by Meg Kissinger

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Quick Take

An equal parts moving and dark-humored evocation of mental illness and the ways it can root itself into a family tree.

Good to know

  • Illustrated icon, Social_Issues

    Social issues

  • Illustrated icon, Family_Drama

    Family drama

  • Illustrated icon, Suburban

    Suburban drama

  • Illustrated icon, No_Quotes

    No quotation marks

Synopsis

Growing up in the 1960s in the suburbs of Chicago, Meg Kissinger’s family seemed to live a charmed life. With eight kids and two loving parents, the Kissingers radiated a warm, boisterous energy. Whether they were spending summer days on the shores of Lake Michigan, barreling down the ski slopes, or navigating the trials of their Catholic school, the Kissingers always knew how to live large and play hard.

But behind closed doors, a harsher reality was unfolding—a heavily medicated mother hospitalized for anxiety and depression, a manic father prone to violence, and children in the throes of bipolar disorder and depression, two of whom would take their own lives. Through it all, the Kissingers faced the world with their signature dark humor and the unspoken family rule: never talk about it.

While You Were Out begins as the personal story of one family’s struggles then opens outward, as Kissinger details how childhood tragedy catalyzed a journalism career focused on exposing our country’s flawed mental health care. Combining the intimacy of memoir with the rigor of investigative reporting, the book explores the consequences of shame, the havoc of botched public policy, and the hope offered by new treatment strategies.

Content warning

This book contains scenes that depict suicide and child abuse.

Why I love it

There’s something about a book that completely entrances you, making the rest of the world fall away for the time you’re reading it. With Meg Kissinger’s memoir While You Were Out, that’s exactly what happened to me. I read this powerful story in one sitting, cover to cover, and barely felt the time pass.

While You Were Out tells the story of the Kissinger family: one rarely rooted in physical location, but always in each other. Kissinger expertly brings her family members to life—you can feel the chaotic energy of her large family bursting from the page. Whether in the suburbs of Chicago or Connecticut, the eight Kissinger children and their parents seemed, from the outside, to live in a state of constant excitement and contentment. Secretly, though, they lived surrounded by unspoken alcoholism, suicide, and hospitalizations. Through the ups and downs of growing up in the throes of mental illness, Meg’s signature humor still shines through, making you feel a part of her family, as if you’re hearing this story be told across a kitchen table. Later, Kissinger’s childhood experiences led her into a journalism career, which gave her a platform to confront her past and dig deep into the issues of the United States’ mental health care.

While You Were Out is both an intimate story and daring exposé of where public policy has failed our most vulnerable. And while often gut-wrenching, Kissinger’s beautiful writing and journalistic flair make it a singular and important read.

Read by the author
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Pretty Boys Are Poisonous
How to Say Babylon
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Thicker Than Water
While You Were Out
Dear Mr. You
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Family Lore
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Hunger
The Choice
Finding Me
If You Would Have Told Me
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Somebody's Daughter
We're Going To Need More Wine
Down the Drain
The Ocean at the End of the Lane
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Dinner for Vampires
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Aftershocks
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Read by the author
View all
Here After
The Many Lives of Mama Love
The Wives
The Rom-Commers
Sociopath
Inside Out
I’m Glad My Mom Died
One in a Millennial
Swan Song
Dearest
Sure I'll Join Your Cult
High School
Let Us Descend
Did I Ever Tell You?
Notes on a Silencing
The Fox Wife
Grief Is for People
When I Was Your Age
Bossypants
Astor
Pretty Boys Are Poisonous
How to Say Babylon
The Other Significant Others
Thicker Than Water
While You Were Out
Dear Mr. You
Calypso
Family Lore
Group
Hunger
The Choice
Finding Me
If You Would Have Told Me
Leslie F*cking Jones
Somebody's Daughter
We're Going To Need More Wine
Down the Drain
The Ocean at the End of the Lane
Pageboy
Dinner for Vampires
Just Kids
My Body
More Myself
Theft by Finding
The Girl with the Lower Back Tattoo
Aftershocks
My Friend Anna
Big Friendship
With the Fire on High